Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
