everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize