The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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