Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
