You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
