This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
