why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
