scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
