Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
