i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
home. puking in laundry basket.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
