I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I supernannyed him into submission
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
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