Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
