Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
