People with herpes should wear stickers.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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