almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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