I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
