in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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