"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
