i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize