I heard we made out
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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