Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
