conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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