let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
