walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
