Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
