You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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