Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
