38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
That accounts for only three of the penises
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Randomize
