...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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