we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
