bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
