Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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