i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
