who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize
