The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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