I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
