youre lurking in front of me
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
They took my balls.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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