ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
