he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Is Oprah even human
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
