Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
