He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize