can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
