New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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