i love accidental penises.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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