just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
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