can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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