I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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