Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
