I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
