did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
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