Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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