apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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