Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
