watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
